Guilt is one of the most common emotions people going through a divorce experience. Divorcing couples feel guilty for many reasons. They may feel guilty for breaking the vows they made when they got married or for making their kids go through the pain of divorce.
Some people have even reported feeling guilty for not doing more in the marriage or staying too long when they knew they were unhappy.
So, how can you cope with divorce guilt?
Forgive yourself
Forgiving yourself is integral in overcoming divorce guilt. To forgive yourself, you need to accept you did everything to make the marriage work. This can save you from the guilt and regret of believing you could have employed one more solution or waited a little longer to try to make it work.
Further, consider going to therapy to get professional guidance on forgiving yourself. Your therapist can help you identify the best ways to do this. They may encourage journaling, self-reflection practices etc.
Additionally, forgive your spouse and others who may have hurt you. Doing this can help you have a peaceful transition to life after divorce.
Practice self-improvement
If infidelity was involved in your marriage, leading to the divorce, you may feel guilty for cheating or being cheated on. If you suggested couples counseling “too late,” you may feel guilty for not bringing it up earlier. If you had communication issues that led to the divorce, you may feel guilty for not improving sooner.
It’s vital to acknowledge that you can’t change what happened – it’s time to focus on self-improvement.
Divorce guilt can negatively impact how you approach your divorce and rebuild your new life. Fortunately, you can manage it. Learn more about the emotions of divorce and how you can cope with them.